No Country For Old Men

It's the wild West and Javier Bardem has a really creepy haircut.  He's a monster killer with no conscious.  And there are these people and they did something bad.  They stole money or murdered people or something.  But they are good people...(laughter)...it was an accident.  Anyway, "page boy" killer...

ME:  Page Boy?

That's his haircut.

ME:  Oh, OK....

is sent on a mission to kill them.  And he keeps finding them and everybody's really anxious that they're gonna be found.  And when he finally finds them, he messes with their mind.  Like he flips a coin in one scene, but either way they're gonna die.  And he's super brutal and he like, I picture him with a gas pipe or something.  And it's a sad ending and everyone dies.  And it's gruesome.  That's it.

Tron

There's big, huge robots and they light up from time to time.  It's kinda like Transformers but more futuristic and they don't transform...but they might.  I'm sure it's really, really boring.  Probably no plot, just a lot of action with lasers and robots.  The End.

Blade Runner

Isn't that were they have a guy and he just slices everybody up when he runs around?

Aliens

I know it's a James Cameron film with Susan Sarandon.  Wait, she's not in it?  Oh, right Sigourney Weaver , I get those two confused.  Signourney is the main character.  The aliens come to the town and it's really scary.  They are not good aliens like E.T., but they're bad aliens.  Is that enough?  I don't know anything about this movie.  I don't even know if that's true.

Inception

Leonardo DiCaprio and Ellen Page.  Leo is a (oh jeez this is hard)...he goes in people's minds and reads their dreams.  And he ends up in one of Ellen Page's dreams.  It seems really real, he's in her dream.  They're on this journey together and people are trying to kill her.  He has to save her.  And then in the middle it's a lot of action like the Bourne Identity where he's a bad ass.  And then someone tries to come in and steal her dream.  I bet it's real confusing at this part.  Then at the end they realize it's just a dream and you're left to ponder what's real.

The Neverending Story

First of all it never ends.  Is this the one where they are in a labyrinth?  I'm asking...(laughter).

Weekend at Bernie's

I think this is the one where a guy is dead at a vacation house.  Probably Bernie.  People are there and they find him and then they hide him because they want to stay at the vacation house.  They probably get caught and hilarity ensues.